Congratulations — you have a match! Now what?

First of all, exciting news! Getting a match means there was mutual interest, and that’s always worth celebrating. Now it’s time to do the most important thing in dating: keep the momentum going.

You may have heard the expression “strike while the iron is hot.” It applies perfectly here. Dating is all about timing and energy. You met someone in real life, you felt a connection, and within 24 hours you both received each other’s contact information — this is your moment.

If you’re a man

Once you receive your match’s contact details, don’t overthink it. Send a simple, confident message such as:

“Hey! I’m really happy we matched. I’d love to continue our conversation over dinner — are you available this weekend?”

That’s it. Clear, kind, and intentional.

Momentum matters. In today’s fast-paced world, things can fizzle quickly — not because of lack of interest, but because everyone is constantly distracted. Acting quickly shows confidence and genuine interest.

When you do plan the date, choose a nice restaurant and make a bit of an effort with your appearance. It doesn’t need to be expensive — great food and a pleasant atmosphere go a long way. (I even have a restaurant guide filled with excellent, reasonably priced options.)

If you’re a woman and haven’t heard from your match after 48 hours

Don’t hesitate to reach out. You can send a light, friendly message such as:

“Hey! I received the email saying we matched — I’d love to meet up and grab a bite to eat if you’re open to it.”

There’s nothing wrong with taking initiative. Confidence is attractive, and clarity saves everyone time.

Ideally, the date should happen that weekend or early the following week. If schedules are tight, a Sunday brunch is perfectly fine — just make sure it’s somewhere pleasant. Try to avoid coffee or quick drinks at this stage; those are more “first impression” dates, and you’re already past that point.

A few final notes

If you don’t receive a response, feel free to reach out to us so we can confirm the contact details. If someone completely ghosts you, they likely won’t be welcomed back to future events — but more on that another time.

And if you realize after matching that it’s not the right fit, honesty is always best. A simple message like this works beautifully:

“Thank you so much for reaching out. After giving it some thought, I’ve realized I’m not quite ready to go on a date, but it was really nice meeting you at the event.”

Lastly, if you’ve attended a few events and haven’t matched yet, please don’t get discouraged. You’re already doing something most people never do — showing up in real life. You are way ahead of other singles who swipe and text and never get a date. Attending an FFL dinner automatically puts you in a space with highly compatible people in a date like setting. Consistency truly is key, and attending even once a month can make all the difference.

I hope this helps you feel more confident and excited as you continue your dating journey. 💛